My heart sinks when I see a lonely teenager sitting in one corner and trying hard to concentrate on the lecture. That’s where I have been! Back in college days, it was good to be a part of the ‘cool’ gang. We would head to the most happening parties together and would share our dirty little secrets too.
Knowing your true friends does not come naturally. There is a process which is quite painful, but necessary.
Learning from Life Lessons
Life teaches you the greatest lessons well in time. Perhaps I learnt it the hard way too! As soon as I was no longer entertaining for them, they showcased their true colors. That’s how life is, and we must not take it to our heart.
John Churton Collins has spoken true and wise words. When happiness rings in, a bunch of people come to you and make merry. What happens when dark clouds surround your perfect life? The same bunch of people leave immediately.
Let me not be too harsh here. There is a silver lining too.
Knowing Your True Friends: How to Know who is Faking it?
Speaking from personal experience, there are some people who would take advantage of you. Perhaps you have a special talent which they do not possess. Welcome to the world where everyone is trying to get a piece of you.
The question is — How to tell a true friend from a fake one?
Knowing your real friends is not a skill. You will find out who your true friends are through different situations.
You would be surprised to know that the people who ask this question are from the age group of 25 and below. By the time you cross your 30s, it hits you that your career, relationship, and self matters the most.
So, you would never get to know who is faking it. But, there are some signs that make it quite crystal clear.
Notice the Signs and Run
John Churton Collins clearly outlines that in good health, prosperity (wealth), and happiness, people will buzz around you like honeybees.
When there are dire situations your side, they will not take long to scurry to another path. Perhaps your friends are not bad, but some people are toxic and they bring you down with them.
Let’s take the classic example of Rhea Chakraborty. She sensed that Sushant Singh Rajput had a mental ailment (as per her). If that was so — why did she leave him all alone? She could inform his father and sisters about the mental illness. This shows that she would only be with him in good health, but not in sickness. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, she left him all alone and absconded with all his belongings.
Let Go of Toxic People
True friends stay by your side always. They do not shy away or run just because the situation is inconvenient.
If you have sensed that a ‘friend’ is just interested in reaping benefits from you, then it is time to run and save your time, money, and effort.
A toxic friend would:
- lack empathy
- be a freeloader
- be untrustworthy
- criticize you time and again
- take you down the drain with them
- never be happy for you
To Sum Up…
Perhaps you like the idea of spending good time with friends. But, there are a set of friends who are not worthy of your time.
If these same set of friends are not abiding by you through adversity, sadness, or sickness, then they are not your real friends.
Knowing your true friends is not an art or a superpower. God and life will show you the right path! If you get a cue, take it as a sign from God and put an end to such toxic unions.
Originally published at https://www.beaninspirer.com on October 12, 2020.